I’m going to say the thing most people writing blogs would never say:
I don’t know what my passion is.
The entire concept of blogging is built upon the foundation of passion. You love the music on the TV show Treme? There’s a blog for that. You think lesbians who resemble teenage pop sensations are awesome? There’s a blog for that. From paying down personal debt to terrible cakes, fashion to fetishes, you can find a person blogging about it.
I would not describe myself as a passionate person. I am energetic. Animated. Lively. Outgoing. A dear friend once said that what she liked about me most was the fact that I was interested in and fascinated by everything. For her, my defining feature is that I have many interests and no singular passion.
Do other people feel that way? How does one pursue their passion when they don’t know what it is? I sometimes worry that I lost my passion – that I was perhaps born to love doing something but forgot along the way what that thing is. Maybe I let teachers or parents or friends distract me with other pursuits or discourage me from certain decisions. More troubling, maybe I subconsciously stopped myself from cultivating a passion as a means of self-preservation.
Do not cry for me, blog readers. Do not develop a mental image of a distraught quarter-lifer, sobbing on her keyboard at her bleak existence. I do have interests, hobbies, and pursuits that bring me happiness, fulfillment, and a means to filling the days. I occasionally get a glimmer of passion, a feeling that perhaps this is it.
And for now, I think that might just be enough.